[opening theme music]
Will somebody please cue that bird?
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats Oooh yeah ♪
♪ Who do you call When you want some pepperoni? ♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats Right on ♪
♪ They're stepping out crime
And you know That ain't baloney ♪
♪ There's Speedy Cerviche ♪
♪ He's the leader of the bunch That's right♪
♪ A heck of a fighter Makes a heck of a lunch♪
♪ And little Polly Esther
Who's never afraid That's me♪
♪ Of going into battle When bad guys invade♪
♪ Here's Guido Anchovy A wild romantic rover♪
♪ This cat gets knocked down With a love hangover♪
♪ Here come the Pizza Cats♪
♪ They're so bad Ta Da!♪
♪ They got more fur than any turtle ever had♪
♪ Stronger than old cheese Stronger than old cheese♪
♪ Stronger than dirt! Stronger than dirt♪
♪ If you step on their tails Get off my tail!♪
♪ And you're gonna get hurt Don't hurt me!♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They're fighting crime All over town♪
♪ Three, two, one♪
♪ Pizza Cats are on the run♪
♪ The Big Cheese is the villain
Who's lower than low♪
♪ It's a rotten shame
He lives in Little Tokyo♪
♪ We got a nasty Bad Bird And some nasty ninja crows♪
♪ As soon as someone find the script
We might begin the show♪
♪ Sit right back, kick up your feet♪
♪ Turn the sound up high♪
♪ And if you want the full effect
Go eat a pizza pie♪
[laughing]
[narrator] A wondering Geisha maestro
strolls through Little Tokyo.
♪ Cheese please, Gorgonzola in the morning
Camembert every night.
Maybe I don't sound exactly
like Bruce Springsteen,
but what did expect for nothing?
Boy, some people are never satisfied.
[narrator] Wait! That's no harmless Geisha!
It's the Big Cheese
in his latest disguise!
[laughing]
I just gained entry
into the government's secret records building
by posing as the maid
and found a priceless tape.
Payday!
The energy source from those Pizza Cats
is a solar powered micro transformer.
It's amazing how much information
you can pick up with a little ingenuity.
And you thought I got into this
ridiculous outfit because I was
going to audition for the Tokyo Rockets. [laughs]
[narrator] And just what does this
reprehensible rodent intend to do
with this declassified
classified information?
[Big Cheese] Ah, so this is the infamous
Sunblock 16 robot.
And you're absolutely sure it will work?
Oh, yeah, I'm positive.
Good, then there's no sense wasting anymore time
we've got to come up with a plan
as quickly as possible.
So what do you say, Mr. Boss man?
I've got just the thing we can cash in on. [laughs]
Fantastic, oh you're such a genius.
So what's the setup, boss?
Remember that warehouse of defective hearing aids
we bought at the auction last year?
I thought it was a sound investment.
Well, I just hired that punk rock group, Rude Noise
to play a concert next week.
They are the loudest band in the world.
At wherever they play, the crowd suffers incredible
hearing loss.
Now imagine this, we force all the people
to go to the concert and when it's over,
we'll be right there to sell them those hearing aids.
Wow, what a plan.
Just amazes me how you come up with that stuff.
[Bad Bird] By the way, Big Cheese,
can you do me a favor and get out of that outfit now?
I mean, I gotta explain this
to my friends when the show is over.
[narrator] Diabolical demons by day,
punk rock instrumentalists by night.
The disruptive known as The Rude Noise
heads for Little Tokyo.
Meanwhile, back at the tea house.
[giggles]
[Lucile] Oh, how cute.
You boys are such jokers.
Yeah, it's wild, alright.
Would you like one of them to keep?
I'd love to.
Let me see which one now.
I think this one of you and me
together came out the best.
Huh?
Oh, yes, this is definitely my favorite.
It seems to have captured all my finer qualities.
Wow!
Why, it's magnificent.
[Speedy] Well, gee, Lucile, thank you.
I mean, you picked the one with you and me together
and I... oh gosh.
I'm taking this right home and putting it in a frame.
What an absolutely positively
super-duper paradigm sensation!
Speedy Cerviche, over and away!
[Speedy yells joyfully]
Don't worry folks, it's a temporary condition.
[upbeat music]
[yells joyfully] What a day!
[Speedy] What on earth is this all about?
What? Why, this says those
rambunctious rascals of radical rhythm
known as the Rude Noise
will be coming here to play a concert.
I didn't know you could read Japanese.
Oh, the Jerry Atric and his criminal crew
are behind this ear shattering scheme.
[narrator] The Pizza Cats suspect
a punk inspired plot.
Hey, I'm not worried about The Rude Noise.
From all the stories I've been hearing
it sounds like they're a worldwide phenomenon.
That's right and so is acid rain
if you get my drift, Guido.
We gotta figure out what they're planning.
I already know. May I have the floor now?
Uh-huh.
Good, I hate hanging from the ceiling.
Now listen, The Rude Noise
are actually hired to damage people's eardrums
so Jerry Atric could unload a bunch of hearing aids.
Why that's the most despicable
devious underhanded thing
I've ever heard in my entire life.
And besides, it isn't very nice.
[Al Dente] Wait, Speedy, listen.
No, no, I must try to stop those crooks.
You see, it is my sworn duty
to uphold justice and therefore
I have a date with destiny.
[Al Dente] You mean that they brew that honey from Arkydo?
One more thing.
Sure, what is it big Al?
Keep alert, look sharp and stay on your toes.
[yells]
Don't worry about me!
I represent truth and justice.
Besides, I'm the star of this show,
and you know how that goes.
Let's go check those Rude Noise out!
And put an end to their audio offenses.
[energetic music]
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They make great pizza but that ain't all♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They are ready to fight
When you need them, just call♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They know how to stop crime
just do what they say♪
♪ If you don't want a bad time
Stay out of their way♪
[laughing]
♪ Oh, I love those cats.
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
Watch them as they fly into action
without concern for themselves,
their dilemma or the Nelson ratings.
The Samurai Pizza Cats!
[Francine] Round and round and round she goes,
how I ever got this job, who knows?
Oh, how pretty.
[Francine] Excuse me, please, I'm sorry to interrupt
the routine flow of your lives,
but the cats have to flash away
before we can make our pizza pies.
So duck your heads and cover your ears
and don't get up until all the smoke clears.
Good rhyme.
[explosions]
Mom, how come you keep staring
up there at the Samurai Pizza Cats?
I find their colorful adventures
fascinating and also mentally stimulating.
Yeah, that is about as stimulating
as watching bamboo grow.
[narrator] Sailing through space
like crime seeking missiles,
the Pizza Cats find a hidden scrapyard
on the outskirts of town.
Where Bad Bird is preparing to launch
his Sunblock 16 robot.
This is the final countdown for those Pizza Cats.
[Bad Bird] Ten, nine, eight,
seven, six, five--
Going somewhere, Bad Bird?
[screams] They're here!
[Bad Bird] The Pizza Cats are here!
Call for reinforcements!
They must not be able to interfere with the launch!
[narrator] The cats don't care about the lunch.
They aren't hungry, but one thing
they really love to do is make an entrance.
One for all!
We fight the forces of evil
and if they don't surrender,
bye-bye!
Yes, when danger appears on the horizon,
who do you call for help?
The Pizza Cats!
[laughing] Let me take this ship into orbit.
We'll see who you call.
[laughing] What do you say?
Now, wait, that wouldn't make any sense.
Are we ready to stop this maniac?
Yes!
[fast paced music]
[screaming in pain]
Oh, don't tell me,
is it The Rude Noise?
[Polly] It's the Rude Noise.
[Speedy] I told you not to tell me that.
[narrator] The Rude Noise, a quarrelsome quartet
of evil brawlers
who's decibels are of deadly proportions.
Thanks, we're flattered.
[narrator] Each one is equipped
with his own specialized weaponry
and ruthless aggression.
I never miss!
[laughing]
[narrator] Why, they are so bad
Attila the Hun would have their records banned.
I hate licorice.
[narrator] As you can see, this is a guy
who plays a very bad ax.
And seeing is believing.
We're a bunch of rotten scums,
and we don't care who knows it.
[sighs]
I'm so glad they went out
and found some guys with a little class.
[Bad Bird] Are you jokers ready to tango?
No, sweat shot, brass. [growls]
[Rude Noise is laughing]
Pardon me, you diabolical dope,
but we don't seem to share
your warped sense of humor.
Come on gang, let's teach
the revolting renegades a lesson!
-Right! -[Rude Noise] You sure
you don't want to change your mind before it's too late?
-No way! -Then let's do it!
[screaming]
[energetic music]
This is my chance to blast into orbit.
Is that a Ginzu sword?
One of a kind.
Imagine that.
[dramatic music]
Hey, what's happening?
[narrator] Thundering mozzarella!
This is a radically gnarly turn of events
for Speedy and the others.
Just when they had the upper hand,
on The Rude Noise,
Bad Bird made tracks for the stratosphere
in his Sunblock 16 robot.
A hideous device
designed to keep the solar rays
from reaching the Pizza Cats.
And thereby, rendering them powerless.
[indistinct]
[energetic music]
I'm gonna give it to them.
Give them all I've got.
Raise my screens way up high
just watch how it gets dark.
[narrator] On the earth below,
a dark cloud casts doom
over the shoulders of our heroic threesome.
[Jerry Atric laughing]
Well, it looks like it's lights out for you Pizza Cats
you don't stand a chance,
so you may as well say goodnight Gracie.
Not on your life, Jerry old boy
so just forget it.
We're not afraid of you, Jerry.
So just get lost.
Listen--
Excuse me for interrupting
but I don't believe that any of you realize
just how serious this is.
The odds are in our favor
you fools give up!
[narrator] I wouldn't want to be in Jerry Atric's shoes
right now. The Big Cheese
accidentally stomped on his bunions.
Hurry up! Now's our chance to make a run for the money!
[Bad Bird] They gotta be kidding.
[Polly] Wow, Igor, it's alive!
You know, it's times like this I wish I stayed in trade school.
That mindless menace and his crew
really cast a dark cloud on us.
Just remember, Speedy, every cloud has a silver lining.
[Speedy] Look, a rock!
[narrator] Yes, and when there's a rock,
there's a cave!
[Polly] Anybody got a flashlight?
[Guido and Speedy] Not me.
[Polly] Great, a fully functioning
cybernetic, technologically advanced team of superheroes
and nobody's got a flashlight?
[Speedy] I guess there's only one thing left for us to do!
Contact Francine on the cellular cat bell.
What? Sounds like there's an emergency.
Better call for help.
Calling Bat Cat at the west side franchise.
The Pizza Cats are in trouble!
Don't worry I'll be there in a supersonic flash, Fran.
[fast paced music]
[Guido] Did anyone hear a supersonic flash?
-[Pizza Cats] Yay! -Have no fear, my friends!
Bat Cat is here and ready for action!
Now the sides are evened up.
Let's see how tough you are!
You fools!
Wake up, tofu breath.
We've got the screens on you
you'll be running out of juice any minute.
Besides, you can't even fly.
So I guess you have to sit back
and watch the show for the time being.
Hey!
They ought to be ashamed of themselves!
[roaring]
[screaming]
Hey, what is this guy? A method actor?
Where's my stunt double!
Oh!
[yelling]
You want us to try and catch you?
No, it's okay. Just let me land on my face.
[screaming in panic]
How's your power level?
Well, it's kind of like everything else
on this show. It just keeps going up and down.
I'll ring Francine again
maybe she can send someone else.
Good grief, not another emergency.
Oh, what a predicament.
There's nobody else I can send out to help.
[screams]
That was a pretty good back flip, Speedy.
I'd like to see you do it again.
[laughs]
Well, now that you've seen our friendly side,
it's time to get down to brass tacks!
-Boy, you're gonna love this. -And away we go!
Mama mia!
[Speedy] I've heard of instant tea
and instant breakfast,
but instant robot?
Look at this.
It's beautiful Jerry, baby.
Beautiful! [laughing]
I love it! I love it! I love it!
[screams]
[energetic music]
[moans in pain]
[weakly] Polly, Guido, somebody say something!
I have nothing to say.
I want to be alone.
It's no use, Speedy.
Powers on, but the volt meter is reading zero.
[laughing]
Looks like you Pizza Cats
are all washed up.
That does it.
Of all the arrogant,
self-centered, unspeakable,
alien creatures that I've had to confront
on this show you take the cake!
[energetic music]
[narrator] At long last
our proud hero, driven by the agony
of defeat and the indigestion of anchovy paste,
Reached down into the core of his being
And call forth one last swell of strength and vitality,
activating the secret and magical force
of the powerful Ginzu sword.
He stands undaunted and ready to
blast his foul foe into oblivion.
Now, Ginzu power away!
[eerie music]
Wait a minute, that's impossible!
[laughing]
Get serious. This robot is solid state
indestructible, so don't even think of a Humpty Dumpty scene.
Yeah, motormouth we'll see about that.
You guys are history!
[screams]
[narrator] Speedy lands another powerful blow...
but...
[growling]
Well, that beats you over two, slugger.
Wanna try again?
[Lucile] Oh, my goodness,
was that an earthquake
or some sort of cosmic vibration
how awesome.
What could it possibly mean?
[Rude Noise] Mind if I cut in?
Alright, snorkel face,
that really boils my briskets.
You're about to get the biggest
jowl of pizza power
that's ever been unleashed!
Ginzu power away!
[narrator] Has Speedy finally
the monstrous mechanism?
-No. -Despair,
I pause to breathe.
Hey, what was that?
Julius Caesar or something? [laughing]
Oh boy! Whoopee!
Who calls my nose a banana?
[screaming]
Man, this contraption is going completely haywire.
[moaning in pain]
[loud explosion]
The Pizza Cat's use of Ginzu juice
have destroyed our indestructible robot!
Maybe it's still under warranty.
Wait, never mind that,
this is all your fault, Rude Noise.
Excuse me for interrupting, fellas, you see I just--
[Jerry Atric] Not this time.
I was depending on that robot
and you incompetent cruck heads have ruined everything!
The concert is off!
What?
You can't do that to us,
we got union cards
and we have a contract.
Come on guys, let's give Bernie our agent a call.
I don't care what you do or who you call
You guys will never work in this town again!
[narrator] But despite what Jerry Atric says,
the Rude Noise intend on coming back
to finish what they started.
Will the Pizza Cats be able to recharge
their transformers in time to fight back?
Tune in next time to the Samurai Pizza Cats
The cats who always land on their...
well, maybe not this time.
On the next...
Pizza Cats!
[narrator] The Pizza Cats decide they're at a disadvantage
when fighting Big Cheese
because they cannot truly fly.
They head off to meet with a world renowned scientist
[indistinct] in order to convince him
to build our heroes a flying robot.
Back in Little Tokyo
Big Cheese is using our heroes'
absence to attack the town
with his latest invention
and burn it to a crisp.
While all that's going on
the cats reach the remote location
where Guru Lu was last seen.
Once they find him, however,
they discover he's a decrepit old man
and who's missing a few pepperonis.
If you know what I mean.
He tells our heroes that they must prove themselves
before he'll help them.
Back in Little Tokyo
the town's in ruins.
But Big Cheese is disappointed
that the Pizza Cats haven't shown up to fight him
and starts an all-out search for them.
Will Big Cheese find them
and defeat them once and for all?
Will the cats prove themselves
worthy and get the flying robot?
Will the people of Little Tokyo
have a barbecue again?
Find out the answer to these
and other important questions
on the next episode of the Samurai Pizza Cats!
Ladies and gentlemen
the Samurai Pizza Cat Fan Club Oath:
The Pizza Cats are samurai
and I'd like to note
their antics take your breath away
like fur balls in your throat.
We kittens are a special breed,
we never call retreat.
Whenever Big Cheese knocks us down
we land upon our feet.
So hail to the old Pizza Cat,
please ring your little bell
although you may be pen and ink
we know you'll fight like
Pizza Cats!
[ending theme music]
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ We hope you liked the show
It's the best that we could do♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ If you could do better
Then we'd leave it up to you♪
♪ Just a reminder You might like to know♪
♪ The cats will be back For another big show♪
[laughing]
♪ Oh gosh♪
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ They're fighting crime Oh yes♪
♪ All over town♪
[laughing]
♪ Two, four, six, eight♪
Why do we exaggerate?
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪
♪ Read all the credits
So you'll know who did the work♪
[laughing]
♪ Samurai Pizza Cats♪